There are a lot of emotions; including anger. Anger can be a powerful emotion, and if not kept tame, it can quickly get out of control. You can damage and destroy relationships by letting your anger get the best of you. Learn some tips to help you manage your anger.
Excess anger is bad for your relationships; and possibly even more importantly, your health. If you do not get your anger under control, you can cause multiple problems for yourself that can be devastating. For some, it can even be deadly.
Some tips that can help you control your anger are:
Give yourself a timeout - If you find yourself getting upset and the anger is building, give yourself a timeout. Walk away from the situation, practice deep breathing techniques, calm yourself down, and relax. Before you put yourself back in the situation, get yourself as calm as you can and focus on the problem, rather than how angry you are.
Find a way to express your anger without getting angry - Keeping yourself calm, express your anger to whomever it is you are angry with. You can be assertive without flying off the handle and getting angry.
Find an outlet for your anger - When you find yourself getting angry, have an outlet in place you can do; such as, go for a run, go for a bike ride, but do something active. Exercise releases endorphins in your brain, which are natural mood enhancers and can help calm you down.
Collect your thoughts - Before you just spew the first thing that wants to come out of your mouth, take a few minutes to collect your thoughts. This way, what you say is planned, rather than spontaneous, which can lead to saying things you don't mean.
Work on a resolution - Take some time to figure out how the problem can be resolved. Rather than just getting angry over a situation, especially ones that may occur often, find a resolution to the problem. Such as; if your child never cleans up his room, come up with ideas on getting his room cleaned up, or close his door.
Forgive - Practice forgiveness. When someone does something wrong to you, practice forgiving rather than getting upset. The more you forgive, each time it will get easier. Start with smaller incidents and work up to being able to forgive for bigger mistakes or problems.
Use humor - Try to find the humor in everything. The more you laugh, the more less serious a problem will seem. Making light of a situation can help lessen the tension, and calm you down before you get to the boiling point. You will soon find that you can laugh easily at all types of situations.
The more you work at handling your anger, the more natural and easier it will be to keep calm. You will eventually find that you do not get upset and angry so quickly. And you will eventually be able to deal with tense and upsetting situations with ease. If you find you still anger easily and it gets out of control, seek the help of a professional to get your anger under control.
Anger can be an overwhelming feeling for a child. Kids tend to feel anger in a physical way that needs to be safely expressed. Teach your child that although it's okay to feel mad, it's not okay to hurt anyone else or hurt themselves. Instead, kids can try one of these alternatives:
- Punch a soft object, such as a pillow or teddy bear.
- Punch, squeeze, and pound some modeling clay.
- Find a source of paper that's okay to rip up, such as an old phone book or newspaper, and rip it up as fast as you can. Then race around the room getting all that ripped paper into the trash.
- Try a vigorous activity, such as running, doing jumping jacks, or shooting hoops.
- Use a marker and a big piece of paper to make furious angry scribbles.
- Ask mom or dad to help you find a safe place to yell loudly, such as in the car or in the garage.
- Write a very angry letter to the person who's making you mad. You might want to give the letter to this person later on so that they understand your feelings, or you might decide to destroy the letter by ripping it up.
Anger issues are common in today's world with constant shifts in the economy and a recent influx in reports of drug and alcohol abuse and dependency. Things don't always work out the way we want them to, and for some of us, when that happens, disaster strikes.
That being said, reports of those with anger management issues have shown a significant increase over the last several years. Usually, anger management classes are a mandate for parole associated with violent crimes, like domestic abuse and aggravated assault. But while these classes are available to parolees, they are also available to those who suffer from anger management problems and thankfully haven't found themselves in that position yet.
http://www.webdiagnosis.com/search/?q=anger+management+support&t=B0140683&sid=CM-VI8lJJ1X-mM8bL631kA is one of the best resources for finding anger management support groups on the web. Not only does this website host a litany of information about anger management, but also offers an easy-to-follow format that allows you to gain access to the treatment you need.
An acupressure technique based in ancient Chinese medicine offers a rapid way to defuse angry feelings right in the moment. Next time you are feeling angry, try tapping these four acupressure points in this order, about seven times at each point:
1. Fleshy part of the side of the hand
2. The beginning/inner part of your eyebrow, near nose
3. Just below the collarbone
4. On the back of the hand, between the last two knuckles
(One or both sides of the body is fine.)
Now take a deep breath. Check and see if your anger has diminished. Repeat the process as needed.
Identifying and dealing with the cause(s) of your anger is important, and holding those thoughts in mind while tapping can help the tapping process be even more effective. You might find that by consistently following the tapping sequence, your original angry thoughts will start to diminish, and affect you less and less.
You can learn more about using acupressure tapping to manage emotions by studying Thought Field Therapy (TFT) or Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT.)
When it comes to seeking psychological help, anger management is a touchy subject indeed. People who are struggling with controlling the amount of anger they feel inside are often reluctant to seek help. When they do consult someone for help, it can be difficult to receive constructive criticism, thus take in anything that the therapist verbally offers.
If you are a person struggling with managing your anger, you must accept the help that is available. You cannot get angry at the person(s) that is trying to help you better your life.They are only trying to teach you how to control and manage the anger that you feel inside. In most cases, there are factors in your life that upset and disturb you. These factors could be from your past, or occurring in the present. The anger management therapist you consult will have to bring these factors to the forefront. In the process, the therapist can make you angry, as he or she will force you to face the demons that plague you. The best way to handle this outrage and negative emotion is to prevent yourself from seeing the therapist as the enemy. It is not the person that is making you angry. It is what the therapist is forcing you to face, and this interaction between you and your problem will only better your life, leading you on a path toward a more peaceful and angst-free future.
When you find yourself in a rage, it is very important to remove yourself from the situation or persons causing you to feel a loss of control. Explain that you need to be alone with your thoughts for a while and quickly extract yourself from the scene.
Once you are alone, it is important to carry on an internal dialogue and reason your way through your anger. Ask yourself the following questions:
1. Am I overreacting? What was it that made me so angry in the first place?
2. If I am overreacting, what can I do to calm down and look at the situation rationally?
3. Do I have unresolved issues that are contributing to my angry reaction? What are they? How do they play in the current situation?
4. What has getting angry accomplished in this situation?
Asking--and answering--these questions may go a long way towards helping you resolve some initial anger issues. If you have trouble controlling your anger, you should seek help through counseling, support groups or other forms of directed help. Don't try to cope on your own when there are plenty of interested parties that can help.
|Sheri Ann Richerson|