February 3, 2006, Newsletter Issue #4: Tyranny of the Should´s

Tip of the Week

If you want to control your anger, tune into how many times a day you use the word "should" in your thoughts about the world, or in your conversations with others. An abundance of "shoulds" reveals a tremendous degree of expectation from others, perhaps unreasonably so.

Swap your "shoulds" with ideas about how to modify your expectations of the world so that they are more reasonable and less stressful.

For instance, "those lousy kids should be better behaved." Well, maybe they could be better behaved if you were not as negative toward them. When you are demanding change from the world, do not expect more than you yourself are capable of giving.

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